People often say that good health is the most precious gift that anyone can have, but a solid relationship may be even more valuable. A strong, enduring partnership gives you love, comfort, and security, underpins your health and happiness, and helps you through hard times.
A good relationship is worth fighting for. When you start to consider the implications of a divorce - the financial aspects, living arrangements, child care, and so on - it may focus your mind and make you reconsider.
Every relationship has its ups and downs, and the Covid-19 pandemic has no doubt added additional strain to many family tensions. Still, if the basics of a strong partnership are in place, many people find a way to hang in there. Read on for some practical suggestions on five of the most common stumbling blocks in a relationship, plus how you and your partner can address them. If you can’t genuinely overcome your differences, we’ll outline some of your options.
If you and your partner find yourselves repeatedly revisiting the same fights and disagreements, there’s almost certainly an underlying issue with your relationship. Constant arguments - often over insignificant matters - might be masking more fundamental problems.
Some couples seem to enjoy their endless bickering, but recurring disputes usually indicate an unhealthy relationship. The solution? Think back to happier times when your relationship began, when you never used to argue. Ask yourself if it’s worth getting so worked up about who takes the garbage out or who walks the dog?
Most importantly, be honest and see whether there’s a more deep-seated cause of the conflict between you both.
A wise person once said, “the solution to every problem is a compromise.” Every relationship should involve some fair give and take. Yet, if you find yourself always giving in and always being the one to concede ground, there may be a problem.
A constant willingness to compromise may not be an issue on more minor things, like where to eat on a given night. But when it comes to more important areas like finances, your freedom, and how to raise your children, it can be enough to break a relationship. So if you don’t want that to happen, find a way to compromise. You may find that mediation is a good start.
No relationship can survive without trust and confidence. Absolute trust is the bedrock of any partnership. Some people naturally find it hard to trust, even in a loving relationship; others give their trust out too quickly and end up dealing with betrayal. There’s almost always an underlying cause for lack of trust, and you’ll never overcome the issue until you recognize and confront that reason.
It can be hard to regain trust in someone if they lie or cheat on you, but it is possible. As with so many aspects of a relationship, communication is key. If you and your partner can understand why things are a certain way, you can hopefully start taking proactive steps to resolve the matter.
You might be saving while your partner is spending or feel annoyed that your wages pay the bills while your partner spends their salary on luxuries. If you’re unhappy about how you handle your finances as a couple, then talk through the issues with your partner. That might just be enough to resolve the problems.
Concerns about finances are often linked to worries about security. In a healthy relationship, you can share your concerns, work through them, and find a workable solution. There’s no room for blame or accusations here: set aside quality time to talk through everything calmly and rationally.
Couples should always make time for one another in their relationship. It’s all too easy to start taking one another for granted or to get into a boring routine. This is especially true when children arrive. The whole family dynamic changes, and when you’re tired or have to devote your energies to a young child, your partner may feel left out.
So even if you’ve been together for a long time, set time aside for each other. Make one night a date night. Get a babysitter. Surprise one another with little gifts. A small gesture can mean a lot.
If there’s one piece of advice you take away from this article, it’s this: good communication is the single most crucial part of any relationship. Love, trust, and thoughtfulness might sustain your relationship, but without good communication on both sides, it’s unlikely to last long-term.
Good communication is about honesty, listening (really listening!), patience, and appreciating the other person’s perspective. If you and your partner can communicate well, there are very few problems you can’t resolve.
It’s a fact of life that things change. People change, relationships change, circumstances change. Sometimes change is positive, and sometimes it isn’t. Sometimes it’s worth persevering with a relationship, and sometimes it isn’t. If your marriage or partnership has reached the point of no return, then it’s time to consider all the options.
Ending a relationship is often a big step into the unknown. For that reason, it’s always going to be beneficial to have the support of a trusted professional to fall back on. A qualified family lawyer has a lot of experience in all aspects of divorce and separation and is well placed to advise you on all your options. Their expertise, help, and support will ensure that your next step is in the right direction.
Look around at your friends, family, and colleagues. There are plenty of couples whose relationship has hit a rocky patch, only to come out the other end. That could be you and your partner too, so why not give it another try? If things don’t work out, then a family lawyer can explain what your options are.